How to manage the 3 P’s

Ahh wild camping. How glorious it is. How free one can be. An activity that instantly conjures up a sense of freedom and reinvigoration – having spent a night so close and connected with nature.

Those wistful gazes into scarlet sunsets, your untamed tousled locks, resting effortlessly on your shoulders – unstirred by the gentle breeze. And, naturally, the graceful rise from your bivvy in the morning.

There’s another side to wild camping. And it’s one that can stir up feelings of nervousness and trepidation for many – our three friends, Mrs Pee, Madame le Poop and Miss Period. Think of them like the Supremes, only better.

Here’s our tips for dealing with the three P’s – including a few kit suggestions to make sure none of the three are a show-stopper for your future nights in the wild. An audience of one is more than enough, after all.

OUR TOP 10 TIPS:

  1. Find a place to wild camp off the beaten path, so that when you’re dealing with one of the P’s, you’re not concerned about being happened upon.
  2. If doing a number two, the standard wild camping etiquette is to dig a small hole to deposit your precious cargo into. No need to dig your way to China, just big enough to take the poop goodies will do. Use your hands or a nearby stick to carve out your masterpiece.
  3. Make sure that the little hole you dig is as far away from any water supply (streams/rivers/lakes) as possible. That will make sure you keep the drinking water in the area… errr…. drinkable.
  4. Be sure to fill the hole back in afterwards. That’ll ensure no one else’s shoe has a ‘wild encounter’ with your number twosie.
  5. Take a few bathroom staples with you on your camp out – toilet paper and or wipes/sanitiser gel. They’ll keep you feeling fresh as a daisy and smelling of roses.
  6. Pop any wipes/toilet paper in a small plastic bag, or scented nappy bag if you have one.
  7. Use the same kind of plastic bags to store any used tampons or pads in overnight until you can carry them out from camp. It may sound a bit rank, but it’s no more rank than a baby’s nappy in a bag.
  8. There is also the option to use nature’s loo roll and find a large leaf to do your wiping, instead of carrying anything. Bury the leaf in the hole with your number two.
  9. Unless your period arrives each month like clockwork, it’s a good idea to carry a couple of spare tampons or pads with you, just in case you get caught out and are a long way from a shop (which, hopefully you will be!).
  10. Most importantly of all, remember to leave no trace. That is, anything that came into the camp with you, needs to go back out. Other than your pee and poo, of course. That can stay. As a gift to the wild and some marvellous compost.

GADGETS

If you’re a gadget kinda gal, then check out these few things we’ve come across, which may make your wild night out a little easier:

  • She Wee: if you’re totally snug and the thought of straying too far from your sleeping bag in the middle of the night for a pee doesn’t appeal, then check out these pee-cups. They’re used loads for music festivals, and there’s no reason why that can’t extend to wild camping. Especially if you’re camping alone and there’s no one else around. Probably not the best gadget to go for if you suffer from ‘stage fright’ however…

  • Pooper Scooper: if you want to dig the best hole in the whole of the universe, or you’re the kind of person who get’s a bit excited about gadgets – then say hellllooooo to the Pooper Scooper. You’ll often find them referred to as a ‘pocket trowel’ and some product descriptions boast that you’ll even be able to ‘poo with pride’! Love it! Like most kit, you can go for the cheapie or the posh pooper scooper!
  • Mooncup: if you suffer from regular-heavy periods, these cups can be a game-changer.  Named after their moon-like shape (as opposed to their ability to transport you to the moon), they’re frequently used by female adventurers, especially in countries where sanitary products might not be readily available or where the ladies are wild camping for weeks on end. The Mooncup is a soft menstrual cup designed by women, for women, and are a convenient alternative to tampons and pads. Plus, with the high plastic content and disposable nature of tampons and pads – the Mooncup is a more environmentally friendly option.

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